at blazing fast speeds of 28.8 Kbps . . .

i log on for the first time since the death of my bachelorhood. i hate moving. let me repeat that. I FUCKING HATE MOVING. overall, it really wasn't any worse or any better than any of my other moves, but moving just blows. especially when you are moving two people into one place. and as usual, none of the utilities are on when they claim they say they'll be. i notified all utilities almost two weeks prior to my move that we needed service moved on soandsodate and sure enough, here i am on a dial up modem, cause SBC is run by a bunch of fucking monkeys. and to add insult to injury, every time i call them to find out the status of my service, i get a brand new monkey with a brand new story. yesterday, it was "sorry, we realized we made a mistake and we're double timing it to get you up and running" where today, it's "we never had the service cut off on the date you requested and it's going to take an additional 10 days to get your service running". but we won't charge you for the dial-up you have to use since we fucked up. gee, thanks. and don't get me going with those ass wipes down at the apartment office. after bitching four days straight about five things they promised to have done four days ago, i had to send my wife down to get them to do something. big tits holds weight with a bunch of mexicans who are holding the to-do sheet.

but otherwise, everything is wonderful. i can't believe i'm married, and happily. i seriously doubted that day would ever come, but we're in our new place and it's gorgeous. i have a wife who's an amazing interior designer and the whole place has an eastern/asian them to it and i love it. very calming, very simple and very elegant.

we're off to Cali tomorrow morning for our honeymoon to hit San Fran, the wine country and San Jose. that'll be a week and then back to the grind. this week has gone by so fast.

stodgy, welcome back to the world. at least the civilized portion of it. thanks for making america the amazing place it is and being someone we are all proud of knowing. please swing by the big D soon and i've got the first round of shots.

Store Wars

This has got to be one of the funniest things i've seen lately.

Grocery Store Wars

where do i stand for a corner kick?

Pele is in talks with Freddie Fields to make a sequel to our favorite football film, Escape to Victory.

This frigging game is ruining my life

well kiss ma grits

isn't that how that amazingly hilarious quote used to go? stated in amazement and shock. well, this ain't Rhoda (or whatever the hell that quote came from), but i've got plenty of four letter words flowing from my mouth. sony released info on the PS3 today at E3 and i'm just amazed. fuck my slow ass computer. this thing can chew bubble gum AND walk at the same time without issue. there's a couple of screenshots here as well as a few shots of some announced games that'll be available upon release. to make my life more difficult, MS has released info and shots on the xbox360 (that's the xbox two for the uninitiated). here's the official website and apparently, everyone's putting out a game on it come this fall. and if ya wanna know how they stack up, hardware wise, check this out. warning: this may cause an uncontrollable hard-on if yer into this kinda stuff.

and if ya want a real boner, check out this E3 film for quake 4. it'll cause some rumblins in yer pants.

and i ain't gonna even bother with the new info on UT2007 or Prince of Persia 3 or the new Tomb Raider.

Stu Padaso

I started playing City of Heroes again. Now that my lovely, game playing, soon-to-be wife has a brand new PC (which is more powerful than mine), she's dying to play games with me. We started right after building it by loading up some Diablo 2, but moved on to CoH where we can all (her son too) log on and play. there've been significant changes since i last played, last summer. Brand new content, new cities, new character builds and powers along with the same old, funny players like my buddy Stu there. I've already built a couple of different characters, but my current build is an AR/Dev Blaster named Bobalina. she a scantily clad, large breasted 5'9" woman that carries around a shotgun and grenades. oh, how i've missed this game.

UT2007

Epic made the announcement yesterday afternoon about the next game in their UT series. it's expected to be similar to the previous 3 versions of UT, but taking the best from each as well as the use of their new Unreal Engine 3 which makes the Doom 3 and Halflife 2 engines look like Pong. Here are a couple of really cool looking screenshots and some details about the game itself.

Here's an example of how the engine renders.


yummy

in case you were wondering . . .

how lightsabers work


Say what again. SAY WHAT AGAIN. I dare you, I double dare you, motherfucker. Say what one more goddamn time

Texas House bans "suggestive" cheerleading

this is verbatim, right out of a yahoo article. and people think texans are normal...

After an alternately comic and fiery debate — punctuated by several lawmakers waving pompons — the state House on Tuesday approved a bill to restrict "overtly sexually suggestive" cheerleading to more ladylike performances.

The bill would give the state education commissioner authority to request that school districts review high school performances.

"Girls can get out and do all of these overly sexually performances and we applaud them, and that's not right," said Democratic Rep. Al Edwards, who filed the legislation.

Edwards argued bawdy performances are a distraction for students resulting in pregnancies, dropouts and the spread of sexually transmitted diseases.

Ribald performances are not defined in the bill. "Any adult that's been involved with sex in their lives, they know it when they see it," he said.

The bill passed on a 65-56 vote. It still must be approved by the Senate and signed by Republican Gov. Rick Perry.

One critic questioned the legislation's priorities.

"Have we done anything about stem cell research to help people who are dying and are sick advance their health? No," said Democratic Rep. Senfronia Thompson. "Have we done anything about the mentally ill, school finance or ethics?"

The American Civil Liberties Union said the measure was unnecessary because state law already prohibits public lewdness by students on or near a school campus.

like a steel jacketed antidepressant to the back of the head

which is my initial response to the newly released, with teeth, by our buddy trent. there's some influence there, but i haven't pinpointed any of it yet and i'm not sure that i'm that impressed with it just yet. he said it'd be different than anything else he's ever done and i most assuredly say he's not a liar, but i don't know if that's good. it's odd going from the annoyingly radio friendly the hand that feeds to the rest of this, but i need more time, so i won't pass to much judgement. not yet . . .

uh, i'd be interested in the tumbler . . .

it is SO on!

and if you enjoy some massive attack (and who doesn't) and wanna see a little Jet Li/Yuen Wo Ping work (Yuen is the man), check out this mini video from Unleashed. this may turn out to be a pretty decent movie after all.