from the mind of an idiot

i haven't posted in a while. last week was frustratingly busy and i just haven't been feeling witty or bitchy or anything as of late. so my apologies to both of you...

was it over when the germans bombed pearl harbor?
i was sitting on the toilet the other day reading thru the new gq or ihop or linnens and things or jugs magazine, i don't remeber. but there were a set of articles written by different authors spouting about the presidential elections that are forthcoming and which of the lesser two axis of evils we have to choose from. personally, i'm a bush fan. i'm a george bush fan as well. i grew up in a family full of republicans, so before i really knew who or why i was voting for reagan or bush I or bush II, i punched the little card or pulled the little lever and voted just to get my old man off my back. now that i'm 16 and can make choices of my own and will be able to watch R-rated movies next year, i'm trying to decide why i should bother voting at all. the articles make some great points about both candidates and unfortunately, as most other discussions have stated, we need to throw out both and start over. elect someone who isn't a nutcase or isn't asking to vote for him because he's not a nutcase. bush is a good man. he has good intentions, but he needs to quit mixing religion and government. hey, your religion is in my government! hey your government is in my religion! two great tastes that taste great...
do we vote for a man that thinks god is talking to him personally and telling him how to run the country? or do we vote for a man who likes to brag about his purple medals and how he acquired them? they both seem to have about the same belief as how they would run the country or keep the germans from bombing pearl harbor again, but i'm pretty sick of the bullshit, "I'm not touching you..." game they're playing right now and wish it were november. i wish i had an answer as to who would do less damage to us and the world, but i just don't know.

the second coming of jebus
you'd think that it was happening around here, cause it's been beautiful and not the norm for what august, texas weather should be. i haven't seen the skies turn red or anthing like that, but i did get bit on the butt a few times for sitting in the grass yesterday morning (does that qualify as plague?). i spend the weekend on my bike enjoying the 82 degree weather. yup, you heard me right, all of you in antarctica. i went to breakast yesterday and actually got chilled without a jacket. i probably shouldn't have just been wearing that thong, but i thought it would be warmer...

the mark has been made
caught Collateral last night and man, can Michael Mann make a movie. he's been stylishly cool in almost everything he's ever put out. maybe it was just the subconscious seed he planted in my mind during my miami vice years, but it's hard to find a bad film made by this man. and cruise should really try this bad guy persona more often. it was a little difficult to pull my gawking stare away from his hair, but when it came down to it, he was a mean motherfucker. and jamie foxx actually did a great job as well. not a whole lot of authentic talent coming from In Living Color, but this guy is making his way up the charts.

i like tacos
...really, i do.

code of business conduct
so, every year, we are seemingly berated for our inability to comply with the code of conduct for the company i work for. it's not like they give us a chance to ever forget. we get quarterly emails from the HNIC of IT reminding us that we shouldn't be speaking badly of others (like calling them the hnic...) or not inviting them into our secret clubs where all we talk about is release schedules and implementation procedures.

other: can i join your club?
me: are you a woman, or jewish or black or crippled or have only one eye or are a bi-sexual hermaphrodite or don't like tacos or are a pittsburg steelers fan?
other: yes
me: piss off you commie

it's not like i'm buttfucking some poor developer in the bathroom with his design document or asking ethnic groups to park at the back of the parking lot. they all get treated with the same amount of angst and loathing that i afford everyone in this company. so why am i logging on to the same website to click YES to being nice to everyone or NO, piss off i'm ready to get canned by those two faced punks down in HR? meh

oh, and chips too
ok, really, that's it.

you eeedeeote!
good news has been brought to the world. John K's masterpiece is being released in october on dvd. the first two seasons of ren and stimpy are finally being dropped into our players to show us how mtv fucked mr. krikfalusi out of one of the greatest cartoons ever made. go preorder your copy now. joy!

duke nukem 3d, this isn't
now that i've had a chance to really get into doom 3 (it's a video game, eric. a really great, scary video game for the pc. kinda like sim city, but not so much.), i'm changing my opinion about it. gamespot put up a review about the game and i agreed with every single word it. now that i've had a chance to pick up the rocket launcher and kill some babies (yeah, i'm a baby killer. what're ya gonna do about it, you hermaphrodite commie?) and run around thru the dark and really see what id has done with this new engine, it makes me all tingly in my private parts. the thing that really does it for me is the level design. this could have fallen into the same bland, meaningless textures and square rooms with elevators, but they've really gone about 5 steps further than before and created some really cool, working machines (albeit, worthless from my perspective, but cool nonetheless) and i've gotten past the fact that a human made installation on Mars would be built with every room having secret compartments for just the reason of mosters from an invading, Hell force to hide in should i ever show up to save whomever is left on the planet. It's a long shot, i know, but i'm over it. and it looks as if some mods have already been released for the silly things that id overlooked like the ability to carry 15 guns and 3 megatons of ammo, but never figured out how to duct-tape your flashlight to your weapon. i know it was done that way on purpose, but the duct-tape and flashbang mods seem to have taken care of that little issue. i'm excited to see what else they'll be able to do with this engine and how they'll be able to expand on the incredibly dull and nonexistent multiplayer side of the game.